Well, apparantly I freeked out my little bro. with the blog and now the father is concerned. Thank heavens the folks haven't read it.....can you imagine mom's reaction? E'hola!

So here is what I have to say...........Another list :)

1- Helllllooooo. I have been doing this on one scale or another for 10 freaking years! I just work so hard to mask it everyday, that people don't see it or forget. :) THAT is talent.

2- This is not quite as bad as my initial fall, because I understand it and I've "been there done that". Although, I never found the original me...the new sarcasm seemed to be entertaining for most. I'm just mad that I'm here again.

3- This is my first time however being a total bitch, having a bite, a broom and my claws out which puts a little bit of a tweak on the experience. Really......I'm full of piss and vinegar. Stacey, I see you snickerin'...it isn't funny.

4- This is my first time I've ever written anything. Corey hasn't seen them and I would never say it outloud. Well,, that isn't true 10 years ago my shrink knew about trying to OD on pills and some of my thoughts. You do know that my life dream is to write a book or talk to groups.........I'm really not an aspired banker.

4- Thoughts are different than actions. If I ever act out. THEN you can panic. I'm too big of a coward and even at the age of 34.....I'm still afraid of my dad kicking my butt.

5-If you are not comfortable with the blunt thoughts then, call mom for the sugar coated update. Which is true, just not detailed.

Now, Stacey and I were talking about "moods" and I again expressed my desire to find a euphoria or a happy pill of some kind. I mentioned calling Bryce to see what drink he reccommends but, Stacey thinks I would get mean. She suggested Pot, which is fine but, if I remember correctly it is more of a Whoa...calming.....chilax dude effect. So, what do you think? Fly to mexico and have a few frozen daquries, try a few good shots at home, look at the vegetation in the old neighborhood for a good smoke? Any other suggestions? food and sugar just isn't sounding or tasting good to me. I texted Bryce. He hasn't responded with his vote yet. I don't think he sees the humor Stacey does. I wont tell you my thoughts about her "Buys rant"'. Apparantly she thinks she's more like mama. Tis, Tis,......she's more balsy than mom that's for damn sure.